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They walk amoung us 7/10/2015
Some guy bought a new fridge for his house. To get rid of his
old fridge, he put it in his front yard and hung a sign on it
saying: "Free to good home. You want it, you take it." For three days the fridge sat there without even one person
looking twice at it. He eventually decided that people
were too un-trusting of this deal. It looked to good to be
true, so he changed the sign to read: ...
2 Comments, 144 Views,
9 Votes
,4.71 Score |
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The lost hot dog 7/10/2015
Two guys wanted to go drinking, but they only had a dollar
between them. One of the fellows looked over at a hot dog
wagon nearby, and had a sudden inspiration. He spent the
dollar on a hot dog. He threw the bun away, and stuffed the
hot down his underwear.
"We're gonna walk into the bar, order beers and
drink them down. When the bartender asks for payment, I'm
gonna stick this hot ...
3 Comments, 90 Views,
10 Votes
,3.78 Score |
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Don't use that any more? 7/8/2015
A lady arriving home from a shopping trip was horrified
to find her husband in bed with a young, lovely thing. She
swore at him, and just as she was about to storm out of the
house, her husband stopped her with these words.
"Before you leave, I want you to hear how this all came
about. While driving home along the highway, I saw this
young girl looking tired and bedraggled, so I ...
2 Comments, 126 Views,
14 Votes
,5.54 Score |
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Don't use that any more? 7/8/2015
A lady arriving home from a shopping trip was horrified
to find her husband in bed with a young, lovely thing. She
swore at him, and just as she was about to storm out of the
house, her husband stopped her with these words.
"Before you leave, I want you to hear how this all came
about. While driving home along the highway, I saw this
young girl looking tired and bedraggled, so I ...
0 Comments, 20 Views,
1 Votes
,2.40 Score |
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docter visit!! 7/7/2015
its nice to see you again doctor!!!http://BlackSexMatch.com.com
0 Comments, 70 Views,
5 Votes
,3.14 Score |
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my favorite joke, hope it aint here 7/5/2015
two best friends go camping in hopes of bagging a huge buck.
the very 1st night they get a 10 point buck, just magnificent.
the take it back gut and start drinking celebrating thier
trip. "man, i gotta take a huge shit!" said one and
wonders off to their shit pit. the other gets an idea, scoops up the intestins, sneaks
around and deposites it in the shit pit and back all while
unnoticed. after ...
0 Comments, 112 Views,
4 Votes
,3.25 Score |
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testicles!! 7/4/2015
There is a factory in Northern Minnesota which makes the
Tickle Me Elmo toys. The toy laughs when you tickle it under
the arms.Well, Lena is hired at The Tickle Me Elmo factory
and she reports for her first day promptly at 8:00 am. The
next day at 8:45 am there is a knock at the Personnel Manager's
door. The Foreman throws open the door and begins to rant
about the new employee. He complains that ...
3 Comments, 117 Views,
18 Votes
,5.17 Score |
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hew pope 7/4/2015
the new pope is not there first choice . they wanted some
guy from italy . his name acola . then they decided they did
not want a pope acola
1 Comments, 61 Views,
5 Votes
,4.77 Score |
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Young Love 7/2/2015
Boy and girl of class 2 asked teacher
can of our age have ?
Teacher replied " NO Never!!
Boy said to girl
see i told you not to worry!!!!
0 Comments, 37 Views,
8 Votes
,3.48 Score |
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The Way Golfers Age 7/1/2015
A foursome of golfers, all in their 40's, discussed
where they should meet for lunch. Finally it was agreed
that they would meet at Hooters because the waitresses
were young, good looking, had big breasts and wore short-shorts.
Ten years later, at age 50, the golfing buddies once again
discussed where they should meet for lunch. Finally it
was agreed that they would meet at Hooters ...
0 Comments, 126 Views,
8 Votes
,4.87 Score |
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Just for boat lovers 6/29/2015
There were these two twins, Joe and John.Joe was the owner
of an old dilapidated boat, and it just so happened John's
wife died the same day that Joe's boat sank. A few day's
later , A kindly old woman saw Joe and mistaking Joe for
John, said, "I'm ...
1 Comments, 107 Views,
11 Votes
,4.10 Score |
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wife vs true love 6/28/2015
A husband went to the police station to file a "missing
person" report for his missing wife: Husband : -I lost my wife, she went shopping hasn't
come back yet. Inspector : -What is her height? Husband
: -Average, I guess. Inspector : -Slim or healthy?. Husband
: -Not slim, but probably healthy. Inspector : -Color of
eyes? Husband : -Never noticed. Inspector : -Color of hair?
Husband : -Changes ...
2 Comments, 160 Views,
13 Votes
,5.66 Score |
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The Love Dress! *HILARIOUS* 6/27/2015
So I thought this would be hilarious to share as I loved reading
it. Hope you all enjoy it too
A mother-in-law stopped unexpectedly by the recently
married couple's house. She rang the doorbell and
stepped into the house. She saw her -in-law standing
naked by the door. "What are you doing?" she
asked. "I'm waiting for my husband to come home from
work, " the -in-law answered. ...
2 Comments, 100 Views,
6 Votes
,4.79 Score |
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Joke 6/26/2015
I went to see my Doctor today. I said to him "Doctor,
I've got this terrible sunburn". The Doctor said "Take some Viagra". I said "What good is Viagra for sunburn?" The Doctor said "It will keep the bedclothes off your
skin!!"
1 Comments, 48 Views,
5 Votes
,3.14 Score |
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Are you Japanese? 6/26/2015
Statistics recently released from the United Nations
reveal that: Australian, Canadian, UK and US men between
50 and 75 years of age will, on average have intimate relations
two to three times a week, whereas Japanese men in the same
age group will have intimate relations only once or twice
a year. This is very upsetting news to most of my friends,
as they had no idea they were Japanese.
0 Comments, 30 Views,
5 Votes
,4.45 Score |
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Are you Japanese? 6/26/2015
Statistics recently released from the United Nations
reveal that: Australian, Canadian, UK and US men between
50 and 75 years of age will, on average have intimate relations
two to three times a week, whereas Japanese men in the same
age group will have intimate relations only once or twice
a year. This is very upsetting news to most of my friends,
as they had no idea they were Japanese.
0 Comments, 12 Views,
2 Votes
,3.81 Score |
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keep the change 6/24/2015
A man joins a very exclusive nudist colony. On his first
day there he takes off his clothes and starts to wander around.
A gorgeous petite blonde walks by and the man immediately
gets an erection. The woman notices his erection, comes
over to him and says, "Sir, did you call for me?"
The man replies, "No, what do you mean?" She
says, "You must be new here, let me explain. It's
a rule here that if ...
4 Comments, 179 Views,
19 Votes
,5.76 Score |
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Fertile 6/23/2015
Do you know how to tell if you are fertile enough to have babies?
She has to chew before she swallows !!!!!........EWWWWWE
1 Comments, 22 Views,
3 Votes
,3.43 Score |
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my wife is deaf docter!!!! 6/15/2015
A man tells a doctor, "I think my wife's going
deaf. What can I do?"
The doctor says, "Well, try to test her hearing. Stand
some distance away from her and ask her a question. If she
doesn't answer, move a little closer and ask again.
Keep repeating this until she answers. That way we can see
how bad the problem is."
The man goes home, sees his wife and says, "Hi honey,
what's ...
2 Comments, 165 Views,
9 Votes
,4.49 Score |
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just imagine the look on her face!!! 6/10/2015
At the bank, I told the teller
"I'd like to open a joint account please."
She said, "OK, with whom?" I said, "Whoever
has lots of money."
4 Comments, 74 Views,
9 Votes
,4.07 Score |
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im a proud woman 6/8/2015
A woman misses a phone call. The woman hears she got a voice
mail, and she plays her recent voice mail from her husband.
The voice mail plays, “This may be my last phone call. I decided to call you.
I took the sail boat out and there is a really bad storm. The mast broke. And my phone is about to die. OMG. The boat is taking on water. Laura just fell of board. I love you baby. Tell the ...
1 Comments, 184 Views,
9 Votes
,4.28 Score |
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my wish 6/8/2015
An old man walks into a bar and orders a beer. The bartender
notices the guy's head is the size of a cue ball.
"I got to ask, sir, " says the bartender. "What
happened?"
The old guy sighs and tells him, "My ship was torpedoed
by the Germans in WWII. A mermaid rescued me and promised
to grant me three wishes. For my first wish, I asked to return
to the States. My second wish ...
3 Comments, 121 Views,
9 Votes
,5.35 Score |
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Dead Sex 6/5/2015
A man was brought before the judge and charged with Necrophilia
(having sex with a dead woman). The judge told him, 'In
20 years on the bench, I've never heard such a disgusting,
immoral thing. Just give me one good reason why I shouldn't
lock you up and throw away the key!'
The man replied, 'I'll give you THREE good reasons:
1. It's none of your damn business.
...
1 Comments, 144 Views,
8 Votes
,4.64 Score |
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the waiter 6/5/2015
Customer: Excuse me, but I saw your thumb in my soup when
you were carrying it. Waitress: Oh, that's okay. The soup isn't hot.
1 Comments, 37 Views,
2 Votes
,3.12 Score |
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school boy 6/5/2015
Teacher: Why are you late? Student: There was a man who lost a hundred dollar bill.
Teacher: That's nice. Were you helping him look for
it? Student: No. I was standing on it.
0 Comments, 21 Views,
6 Votes
,2.80 Score |
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inteligent woman 6/5/2015
Man: I could go to the end of the world for you. Woman: Yes, but would you stay there?
Man: I offer you myself. Woman: I am sorry I never accept cheap gifts.
Man: I want to share everything with you. Woman: Let's start from your bank account.
0 Comments, 14 Views,
1 Votes
,5.00 Score |
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intelegent woman 6/5/2015
Man: I could go to the end of the world for you. Woman: Yes, but would you stay there?
Man: I offer you myself. Woman: I am sorry I never accept cheap gifts.
Man: I want to share everything with you. Woman: Let's start from your bank account.
0 Comments, 3 Views,
0 Votes
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the idiot dad 6/5/2015
: Dad, what is an idiot? Dad: An idiot is a person who tries to explain his ideas in
such a strange and long way that another person who is listening
to him can't understand him. Do you understand me?
: No.
0 Comments, 12 Views,
2 Votes
,2.42 Score |
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little johny 6/5/2015
Little Johnny: Teacher, can I go to the bathroom? Teacher: Little Johnny, MAY I go to the bathroom? Little Johnny: But I asked first!
0 Comments, 22 Views,
2 Votes
,3.12 Score |
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school life 6/5/2015
PUPIL: "Would you punish me for something I didn`t
do?" TEACHER:" Of course not." PUPIL: "Good, because I haven`t done my homework."
0 Comments, 5 Views,
1 Votes
,5.00 Score |